“Weapons of Ass Destruction”

I’ve thought a lot about a few things since last I wrote.

1) Last week I started using an elaborate system of post-it notes to keep everything I needed to accomplish straight. After telling Brian about this, he said “wait. You just used the words ‘post-it’ and ‘elaborate’ in the same sentence.”

He was right. Who was I kidding?

2) I want to make millions producing a workout tape entitled “Weapons of Ass Destruction.”

3) Celestial Seasoning’s Peppermint tea is seriously freakin’ awesome.

Of pinball and spoilers

Ahhh. Now, it is up. Along with a new collection of poems, a flip of the coin.

In celebration:

Of pinball and spoilers

You go right ahead and
play your game of
pinball on the streets.
After all, the curbs are only
bumpers- loose boundaries meant
to build up your points before
you lose your cool and
the flippers stop saving your ass.

Yeah, feel free to play, kid,
down the trashed lanes where
the rich dwelled decades ago.
Up the avenue where my
neighbors’ 8 year old will
flip a marble to catch and ride
the vortices of your
80 mph, red, speed-trap
of women staring with
red lipstick reflecting
your gangsta smile.

You’re that 8 year olds’ hero.

And when he turns the corner
and that 16 year-old finds himself
behind the wheel
of his own dream machine,
all bright and shiny
waiting for that plunger to be pulled back
so he could be let go
and find freedom in his speed,
he’s gonna remember your smile.
And like a damned fool
he’s gonna lose his cool
for some red lipstick
promising that old multi-ball madness
for the price of honor
found in proving his high score
against other testosterone-junkies
just like him.

He’s gonna find out at death speeds
he ain’t no wizard

and that’s when that machine of his
will scream “TILT!!!”,
the bells and whistles will die down

and he’ll pray that the
extra ball light he’s been saving
will return the favor,

and save him.

My date with Meg Ryan

I saw Meg Ryan Saturday. She was like, five feet away. I’d love to say that we had coffee, walked along a garden path with autumn leaves falling around our feet and declared our undying love for each other while a gaggle of fireworks exploded above us.

But sadly, there were no fireworks, it was cold, clammy and raining, and she probably hates coffee.

Here’s to the dreams of movies and cinema, manifested in a strange metrosexual fascination with Jude Law and an undying adoration for flippant conversation, warm colors and beautiful camera angles with clever narration.

Font on a Mission

So, for my final project for my English class, I’m writing a proposal for a video game in which fonts battle for dominance over your computer. Taken from today’s draft of the proposal:

“Font on a Mission” is a side-scrolling platformer allowing the user to use selected characters from a font to fight other fonts over terrain such as notebook paper and dot matrix printouts.

In the world of computers, fonts are often taken for granted. They help to share ideas and are the root of our language in the 21st century. However, no one quite understands that these fonts have feelings far beyond what standard emoticons ( 8-p ) show. They are born, live their life, and die in a realm of ones and zeroes.

And these fonts want to strike back.

Not against you or me, but against the other fonts on your computer. These fonts are fighting a war for dominance. A war for love. A war against the threat of deletion.

And so, this game aims to show the struggle of these fonts to take back lands that belong to them. Starting with the notebook page and fighting a relatively low-key doodle font, to fighting a blocky bitmap font on a dot matrix printer, and finally coming face to face with the dreaded mono-spaced Courier font within a jungle of code.

Why can’t all my projects be like this?

And now, I have thoughts of a quiz due at midnight tonight, a lab final tomorrow, a website due next wednesday, and a whole lotta caffeine.